moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize