You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
