the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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