maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
How external is "for external use only"?
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
