you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I AM VODKA MAN
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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