Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
