I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize