walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
