wanna go halves on a baby?
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
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