YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize