So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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