My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
We left an ass print on the piano.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Also, beer. Big fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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