HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
