dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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