Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
