The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal