I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
