thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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