Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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