If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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