And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Randomize
