what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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