if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
