I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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