i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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