let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
