I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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