I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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