Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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