Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize