Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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