Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
