she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
