the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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