All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
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I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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