dude i'm inner monologue high
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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