i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
