She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
