weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
