If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
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