It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Randomize
