allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
True strength comes from lack of pants
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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