Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
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