its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I AM VODKA MAN
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
