I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
