He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
