I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
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