Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
