OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Randomize
