So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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