she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
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I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
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Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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